


Fly the Coop

by thranduils1



Series: Fly the Coop [1]
Category: The Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: Angst, F/F, F/M, Forbidden Love, Heartache, Heartbreak, Love Triangles
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-13
Updated: 2018-11-25
Packaged: 2019-08-23 01:18:19
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 21,024
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16609103
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thranduils1/pseuds/thranduils1
Summary: Reader escapes with Sherry and decides to go find Rick and his group. Negan is not pleased he has lost two of his wives. Eventual Reader/Tara.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Moving my fics over from Tumblr. Originally posted 4/6/17.

“Stop!” Sherry whispered to you and you did as she asked. She pulled her knife out of her holster and crept towards where a walker was coming through the woods. She was stealth like and to be honest, you were surprised she was taking this head on. You knew she had killed walkers before but you’d never known her in that past life.

All you knew her as was one of Negan’s fellow wives.

It was odd to see her not wearing a skin tight, black dress and heels. Rather, the two of you had changed before leaving the Sanctuary and it felt good to be back in comfortable jeans.

Sherry took the walker out quickly and quietly before coming back to join you.

“I didn’t see any others,” she informed you, wiping her blade off before putting it back in the holster.

“I’m sure there’s others.”

“Of course.”

You studied her for a moment before asking, “Where are you going to go?”

Sherry looked confused before questioning, “What do you mean?”

“From here. Where are you going to go?”

Cocking her head to the side, Sherry regarded you for a second before questioning, “Are you telling me we aren’t going to stick together?”

“I have a feeling that you are not going to want to go with me where I am planning on heading.”

“I didn’t think you had a plan. You just wanted to leave.”

Nodding, you replied, “I did want to leave. But, it doesn’t mean I didn’t have a plan.”

Sherry scoffed a little before exhaling sharply. “So, where are you planning on going?”

“To find Rick.”

Her eyes widened slightly and immediately she laid into you, “No, that’s not smart. You want to get away from Negan? Running to a place where he has them under his thumb is not going to work out well for you. Plus, they make runs to pick up supplies at these places. And they ransack them. They’ll find you again. He will find you again.”

You had considered all of this since the two of you had escaped the Sanctuary. You had had a mind to join anyone who was going to work against the Saviors if you had a chance to do so. You didn’t agree with their tactics and most of what Negan decided to do. This was your chance.

“I highly doubt that he has them underneath his finger based on Daryl’s behavior. I should have asked him where they were at… we shouldn’t have just left him to his own devices. He should have come with us.”

Sherry shook her head, “No. No he shouldn’t have. He had somewhere else to be at and who knows if he would have trusted us? He might have hurt us to be honest if we stayed to help him leave. He wouldn’t have known if we were being honest. It was smart to not ask him. And it’s smart of us to stick together and not go after this foolish idea.” You said nothing and Sherry stepped closer. “Y/N… we can just go somewhere else.”

You met her eyes and told her earnestly, “Negan will find that place too.”

“Not if we keep on the move and find a group farther away.”

“Don’t you want to do something about what the Saviors are doing?”

“No.”

Her response caught you by surprise. More so the tone in which she said it. She looked dead serious.

Shaking her head, Sherry repeated, “No. I do not. I want to survive. Fighting them only results in death.”

“Not if you do it the right way. We could help Rick. We know the Sanctuary. We can tell them the floor plans –”

“If you want to go find him, be my guest,” Sherry interrupted you. “I’m not going to be a part of it. I won’t go somewhere there is a high chance that Negan will find me again. And you should do the same. For your own safety. You know he’s going to be furious when he discovers us and Daryl gone. And if he finds you again… Y/N reconsider this.”

You closed your mouth, peering at her with disappointment. When Sherry had suggested that she was going to escape, you thought she had it in her. She’d had the guts to let Daryl go. But apparently not for this.

“I’ve considered it a lot. I think it’s the right thing to do.”

Sherry sighed loudly and cursed under her breath. She was quiet for a few moments before saying, “Fine. If that’s what you want to do. But, I cannot go with you.” It looked like it pained her to say so.

“I understand.”

Closing the space between the two of you, Sherry pulled you to her, bringing you into a tight hug. You hugged her back, holding her close. You two had only known each other for a short amount of time but what the two of you shared in common was something that would bond you guys for however long you managed to stay alive.

Pulling away, you gave her a small, quick smile. “Take care of yourself. Please.”

“You too.”

“Wait,” Sherry said as you started to turn. “Give me your map.” You began digging in your bag as she explained, “I can show you were Dwight and I… and Tina… where we met up with Daryl that one time. I’m figuring they were somewhere around there.”

“Oh,” you acknowledged. “Thank you.”

She scanned the map quickly before drawing a small circle. Handing it back to you, she informed you, “I still think it’s a foolish idea.”

“I’ll be fine,” you responded sincerely.

“I hope so.” Her eyes lingered on you before she pulled you in for another quick hug. Pulling away, she told you, “Good luck.”

“You too,” you repeated.

You were on your own, holding onto hope that you could find Rick and that he would allow you to help.

<> <> <>

Negan walked up the stairs, muttering to himself pissed off. Daryl had been discovered missing and he was not in any type of mood to be messing with at the moment. He had killed the guy who had been put in charge of overseeing Daryl’s cell at the time, which only staved off a bit of his rage.

Walking into his wives’ room, he immediately felt something was off by the way they all cowered a bit seeing him. Did he really look that pissed off?

Lowering Lucille from his shoulder, he sighed loudly, forcing a smile on his face. “Ladies, I apologize. Some fucking shit head pissed me off. I’m not angry with you.”

There were quick exchanged looks that Negan did not miss.

Running his eyes around the room, he asked jokingly, “Is there something on my face? I thought I got all the blood off.”

Still nothing except uncomfortable shifting.

Negan was getting annoyed now. Stalking over towards the bar, he demanded, “Seriously, what the fuck is your guy’s problem?” He grabbed himself a beer and grabbed a bottle of whiskey as well. “Come on, Y/N, come take a shot with me. I know you’re always down for that. And I need to calm my nerves.”

He didn’t receive a response.

Looking over his shoulder, getting angry at being ignored, he ran his eyes around the room looking for Y/N. “Where is she?” he questioned when he realized she was not in the room. No one said anything, just stared at the ground or anywhere that wasn’t Negan’s eyes. Turning around fully, he placed the beer back on the bar before walking over to Tanya.

“Where is she?” he repeated with more force.

Tanya looked nervous. She shrugged, “I…I don’t know. Her and Sherry haven’t been back.”

Negan ran his eyes around the room again, this time looking for Sherry. His heart was beginning to race a little, his mind immediately going to a dark place. Daryl gone… Sherry’s subtle concern for him… the two of them gone…

Clenching his jaw, he focused his attention back on Tanya and demanded, “How long have they been gone?”

“All day?”

“Since when?” Negan practically growled.

Tanya looked extremely uncomfortable, “I don’t know. Maybe around 10 this morning?”

That was around when Daryl had escaped. Negan ran his hand down his face and turned around, his rage racing back up to full capacity in a matter of seconds, hitting harder this time considering now two of his wives were gone. He was starting to see red.

“GOD. DAMNIT!” he bellowed as he kicked over an end table, the glass shattering when it hit the floor. He kicked at the glass, stomping on it more. He lost his cool and in the moment he didn’t care. “God fucking shit fucking fuck bitch!”

Whipping around he faced the wives again, his chest heaving. “And why the FUCKING fuck did you not say anything sooner!”

“W-w-we haven’t seen you!” Tanya stammered.

Negan looked annoyed to high heaven, rolling his eyes dramatically. His hands shaking with his anger, he spat, “You’re allowed to talk to other goddamn people Tanya! Ya see some shit that’s off, fucking open your mouth!”

Tears were springing to Tanya’s eyes and she sputtered out, “I-I’m sorry.”

Seeing her tears, Negan lowered his hands and took a deep breath, trying to bring himself back under control. He was embarrassed he had let it out like this in front of them.

Finally, he exhaled sharply, speaking at a normal level, “You’re fine. You’re fine… Tanya. I didn’t mean to shout at you. I apologize. From the bottom of my goddamn, black heart, baby. I’m just… frustrated.” Tanya nodded stiffly, a tear falling down her cheek. Negan let out a little sigh and walked over to her, leaning down and giving her a kiss on the top of her head. “Really, baby. I’m sorry.”

“Okay,” Tanya whispered.

Negan gave her a little squeeze on the arm before he looked around the room again. “I’ll send some shitbird in here to clean that mess up for you ladies.”

With that, he turned, grabbing Lucille from the bar, leaving his beer behind.

Simon was coming up the stairs when Negan loomed over him from the landing. Simon stopped on the stairs, noticing the look on Negan’s face.

“We gonna go looking for him?”

Negan rose his brows and said, his tone a little menacing, “Oh, yeah. And for two of my little lovely birds that have mysteriously flown the coop at the same time as that asshole.”


	2. Chapter 2

It had to have been a couple of days. You had found shelter inside of an abandoned shed, which had been extremely uncomfortable to sleep in. The following day, you had hid in the trunk of an old tree when some of Negan’s scouts had driven by. You had hid for an hour before feeling safe enough to come out, even if you had heard the truck drive away long before that.

You were getting tired and you were low on water. You had a couple more cans of food, but you were afraid to open them, not knowing when you would get more.

Walking along a river, you felt something watching you. Stopping, you turned your head, looking around the forest. You didn’t see anyone but that was doing little to calm your nerves. You fingered the knife at your hip, ready to use it if need be and pressed on slowly, keeping your ears open.

You only got maybe a hundred more feet before you heard noises, like something running at you. Your heart started pounding. It sounded like hoofbeats. And before you knew it, you were surrounded by armed people with weapons.

“Don’t even think about it,” a man ordered, seeing you clench your knife. His gun was raised at you. “Drop it.”

What if these weren’t Rick’s people? They were close enough to the Sanctuary that you were sure they would have a deal worked out with Negan. And if they did, would they turn you in if they knew who you were?

You would have to keep your identity a secret. And what else could you do but to listen to his demands?

Slowly, you pulled the knife away from your hip and felt the tension in the people surrounding you. Holding it an arm’s length away from your body, you let it drop into the grass.

Raising your hands above your head, you focused in on the man who was giving you the orders.

“What are you doing out here on the outskirts of the lands of King Ezekiel?”

King Ezekiel?

Swallowing sharply, you answered, “Walking?” The man looked unamused with your attempt at sarcasm. “Looking for somewhere to stay,” you answered with more honesty this time.

“Where’s your group?”

“Don’t currently have one.”

“Any particular reason for that?”

“Yes.”

“Which is?”

“I didn’t like it there.”

“Where?”

“They’re in a camp back in that direction.” You gave a nod of your head in the general direction of the Sanctuary, not being too particular. “I don’t know how far. I’ve been out here for a few days. Just walking.”

You risked a look around at the other people and were met with hard stares. The other people were watching you with scrutiny. They weren’t too trusting, which in this time was a smart choice. You just hoped they were trusting enough and you were innocent looking enough that they would let you go back with them so you could find your grounding and figure out where they were located. And who their leader was and if they knew Rick.

There was a moment of silence before the man gestured at you to another man and this man slid off his horse, advancing on you with his gun. You waited as he patted you down and tore your backpack from you. Vexed, you rose your hands again, making sure they stayed where the leader could see them.

The man was rummaging through your bag and you prayed they weren’t going to just take your supplies and leave you.

“Couple cans of food, water, a few articles of clothing. No more weapons,” he informed the leader.

Meeting the man’s eyes again, you waited for him to make a verdict.

“Take her bag with you. Grab her knife. You,” he directed this at you. “Follow us.”

Relief flooded through you. They weren’t the nicest of people but you were hopeful you would at least have shelter wherever they were taking you.

<> <> <>

The Kingdom – as they called it – had put you in awe the second you had walked through the gates. It was nothing like the Sanctuary, which was so cold and lifeless. There were families here, gardens, homes, laughter. Heartfelt laughter rather than cruel.

You had only seen what had been on the path they had led you through. They were taking you directly to see their King. As bothersome as the man – Colton – had made it seem that you would be seeing Ezekiel now. The King was a busy man and you may have to wait until he would give you audience. Everyone here spoke as if they were in medieval times and even though it came off as a bit cultish, you didn’t feel any sense of danger.  
Colton had left you outside for a few minutes before coming back. “The King is busy with another group. He will see you afterward. You will wait here.”

“Do I have any other option?” you asked a bit sarcastically.

Eyeing you up and down, Colton responded, “No.”

“Didn’t think so,” you replied before sitting down, and leaning back against the wall.

<> <> <>

It didn’t seem like a very long time before you heard voices coming from the other side of the door down the way and the door swung open. A man exited followed closely by another and then an entire group. There were guards with this group and you wondered if it was their king.

The moment he opened his mouth, you knew it was. He was speaking in a grandeur voice, explaining his camp to this group. You made to stand up but Colton put a firm hand on your shoulder keeping you down.

Ezekiel’s eyes landed on you and he stopped speaking to Rick. “What’s going on?”

“Next meeting. Found her out in the woods, your majesty,” Colton explained.

Your heart leapt into your chest when you spotted Daryl mixed in with the group and again, you made to get up but Colton kept you sitting down.

Unfortunately, anger flashed across Daryl’s face as he recognized you and your heart sank as quickly as it had rose. He advanced on you quickly, shoving past the other people in the group and Ezekiel watched with a concerned expression. “The hell she doing here?” Daryl snarled at no one in particular.

You felt everyone around him tense up at his ferocious reaction to you.

Ezekiel eyed you wearily, “Who are you?”

“One of Negan’s wives!” Daryl spat out before you could answer.

You immediately felt a million weapons pointed towards you. Eyes, hands, guns, knives… all of it.

“Wives?” Ezekiel asked, shooting Daryl a look to see if he had misheard. He didn’t seem to believe it was plural.

Colton, on the other hand, seemed unfazed by the statement and more concerned with protecting his king. “This true?” Colton demanded from above you, his grip tightened on your shoulder, causing you to wince.

You shot him a worried look before you looked at Daryl again. This was not the way you wanted this conversation or situation to go. You needed to try to get it back under control quickly.

“S-s-sherry and I let you out,” you addressed Daryl. “She unlocked the door for you, gave you the key.”

Daryl’s face didn’t soften at this. “Why?”

“Felt bad.”

He scoffed, “Didn’t seem to feel that bad when her and her asshole husband stole my bike and left me in the middle of the goddamn woods!”

You defended her, “She made a mistake. She wanted to right it. And we both wanted to leave. And if were going to, she wasn’t going to leave you behind.”

“Where is she now?” Ezekiel questioned you, finally speaking. He eyed the men who had brought you into the Kingdom. “Did you see anyone else out there with her?”

“No, your majesty. We were following her for quite a way. There wasn’t anyone else,” Colton responded.

Ezekiel’s eyes were on you again and Daryl was still burning a hole through you with his stare. “Where is she?” he repeated.

Shrugging, you answered honestly, “I don’t know. She didn’t want to go the way I was going, so we split up. A couple of days ago. It was near the Sanctuary. I… I don’t even know if she made it that far or if they found her again. I saw them scouting for us. I hid in a tree and waited for them to pass. I heard a lot of trucks on the road, so I stayed off of it and went further into the woods. And decided to follow the river. Figured that’s how people used to survive, being close to a water source, and felt it was a good bet people would be near it.”

“Smart,” Ezekiel acknowledged curtly. He was far more calm about the whole thing than Daryl seemed to be. “I am still unsure though about why you left the Sanctuary in the first place.”

Exhaling, you answered, “I don’t want Negan to win.”

“Win what?”

“His… hold he has on everything. He does a lot of fucked up shit – pardon my language. The people who follow him are not good people.”

Daryl cut in again, still aggressive, “Yeah? And how do we know this isn’t a trap?” Ezekiel shot him a slightly annoyed look at being interrupted but it went unnoticed by Daryl.

Something lit in you and you knew this was the time to lay some hard truths. “You honestly believe we want to be under his thumb? Waiting for him to come choose which one of us he wants to stick his dick in that night?”

You noticed Ezekiel, not to mention the others, flinch under this statement. Maybe you were making headway. You for sure weren’t going to stop.

“Do you think Sherry prefers Negan over Dwight? Her husband? She didn’t choose to be one of Negan’s wives for shits and giggles. She did it to protect Dwight and keep them both alive. Frankly, I don’t want to have to do that anymore to survive.”

For the first time since he had approached you, Daryl looked flustered. He shot a look around before regaining enough muster to scowl, “Can’t pin you as not loyal to him still. Or if he’s not going to come looking for you still. Said he was out on the road, probably hasn’t stopped.”

“True. It hasn’t been even five days since I slept with him. Who knows if I’m pregnant? And if I am, you can be sure he’ll be furious if he finds out especially since I left and he doesn’t have control over it.” You paused before adding, staring him down. “And who knows if he isn’t looking for you instead of me?”

Daryl straightened up and Ezekiel cut in again, “Silence!” The two of you shut up immediately. No wonder Negan had wanted Daryl to stay there and be on his side. He was aggressive and confrontational. Just the thing Negan was looking for in his people. But, unfortunately for Negan, Daryl already was loyal to someone else. He had a family. You tore your eyes from him when Ezekiel continued, “I would wager it is both of you.” He shot a look at Colton and requested, “Please. Take her inside. I will come back and speak with her when I am done with Rick and his people.”

Rick?!

Your eyes shot around the group quickly. “Rick is here?” you blurted, unable to stop yourself.

Ezekiel cocked his head a bit before stating, “Yes… why?” He seemed cautious.

“I was looking for him. It’s the reason Sherry wouldn’t go with me. She didn’t think it was smart or safe,” you admitted in a word vomit to him, deciding on a whim that divulging this information would benefit you in the long run.

A woman was eyeing you closely, a dangerous glint in her eye. She did not look like someone you wanted to get on the bad side of.

Ezekiel made no movement or indication he was going to tell you more and you felt discouraged. Of course he wouldn’t trust you yet to point Rick out or lead you to him.

There was movement to Ezekiel’s left and the man who had walked out with him initially came forward, staring you down. His hair was longer and a beard adorned his face. But it was his eyes that caught you off guard. They were a striking blue.

Looking you over curiously, the man was silent. His eyes locked with yours and he informed you, “Probably isn’t smart considering who you are…” he started before pausing. He looked you over one more time before finishing, “But I gotta admit, you got me curious. I’m Rick.” 

<> <> <>

Negan slammed the door of his truck before turning angrily towards the entrance into the Sanctuary. Him and Simon had been out all day searching for Daryl, Sherry, and Y/N to no avail.

Dwight was waiting for him at the door and Negan announced, “You better be standing there because you have some good news to tell me, Dwighty-boy.”

Clearing his throat, Dwight answered, “I would consider it some good news.”

“The other guys find ‘em?” Dwight shook his head. “None of them?” Dwight shook his head again. “Then how in the fucking hell do you have good news for me?”

Standing up straighter, Dwight replied, “Found this.” He held up a locket and Negan recognized it immediately. His eyes widened a bit and he reached out, snatching it from Dwight’s hands.

Giving it a quick look over, he demanded, “Where?”

“About a mile west.”

Negan looked up, realization dawning on him. He scoffed, “I pegged Daryl as someone a little smarter than that. What dumbass would go back to the place that I would immediately think of him going to?”

“A dumbass?” Dwight offered.

Negan smirked at this, and the smirk turned into a broader smile. “I’m sorry I doubted you, Dwight. This is good news.” He paused before moving the locket in between his fingers slowly. “Now, I hope my darling Y/N didn’t throw this away simply because I gave it to her.”

“I doubt that. She probably just lost it,” Dwight responded. Negan stuffed the locket into his coat pocket and Dwight asked, “You wanna go looking in that direction tomorrow?”

Negan shook his head and said with an airy tone, “I have to deal with something. I’ll send Simon. He will know how to rile Rick up and get him to talk.” There was a malicious look on Negan’s face before he moved past Dwight into the Sanctuary.


	3. Chapter 3

Rick had sat down with you and listened to what you wanted while he waited for Ezekiel to make a decision. You hadn’t caught what the decision was and you weren’t about to prod. You didn’t want to come off as nosy. That would be sloppy.

When you finished speaking, he sat back in his chair, silent. His eyes were scrutinizing, watching you closely. He didn’t seem to know what to make of you.

“Negan doesn’t seem like the type to give up something he’s lost easily,” Rick finally said. You waited for him to continue, thinking you knew where he was going with it. He looked at you pointedly. “Especially a woman. Two from what you’re telling me.” He had been going where you thought he was.

You agreed, “He is quite attached.”

“So, you can see why I would think it’s not safe to bring you back with us.”

You’d been expecting this. “Negan thinks I’m incompetent in protecting myself. He never saw me out on the road and he’s never seen me kill a walker. He’s gonna be looking for me – and Daryl and Sherry – for awhile and I wouldn’t be surprised if he looks back to your home. But, he’ll eventually think I got eaten by a walker when he can’t find me. He thinks I’m delicate. I played that part well.”

Rick looked like he was trying to not smile.

“How do we know you aren’t playing a part right now?” The woman, Michonne, behind Rick asked you. Her arms were crossed, off-standish.

Meeting her gaze, you vowed, “I don’t have to. I don’t feel threatened.”

She didn’t look convinced. Rick was hard to read, so you didn’t know what he was thinking.

“Bringing back both you and Daryl isn’t a smart idea.”

“I know what I’m asking of you –”

“I don’t think you do.”

Clearing your throat, you conceded, “Fine, I don’t know the extent of what I’m asking you. I can’t see the future. But, I can get a general gist of what a risk you would be taking in taking me in for a multitude of reasons. One being the safety of your group.”

Rick nodded, “Correct.”

You fell quiet and let him think again. He looked over his shoulder at Michonne, who merely peered down her nose at him, saying nothing. But you could tell they were communicating without speaking. Their eyes said enough. Rick turned his gaze back to you and said, “I have a feeling I shouldn’t turn you away. But, I need some time to think.”

That was better than you had hoped for considering how much he seemed to rely on Michonne’s opinion and she seemed to not trust you. With good reason, you had to admit. You couldn’t blame her. “Fair enough.”

Rick got up and told you, “I’ll let you know.”

<> <> <>

In the end, Rick had decided to keep you here at the Kingdom with Daryl, who was extremely reluctant. It made sense to you that Negan wouldn’t think to look here. And it seemed that the Saviors never came into the compound here, so it would be safer. Part of you thought Daryl was more pissed he was stuck at the same place as you again, even if it wasn’t the same. He had shot you an angry look and stormed off after his group had left.

Morgan was kind and offered to fully show you around and you accepted graciously.

<> <> <>

Simon walked up the stairs to Negan and Negan didn’t even have to ask him how it had gone by the look on Simon’s face. Negan rolled his eyes, sighing annoyed.

“None?”

“No.”

Negan swung Lucille angrily, letting off some steam. He threw his arms out, “Where the fuck could they have gone?”

“They might not even be together.”

Negan snorted loudly at this, “I highly doubt that. Daryl, yes. He could definitely take care of himself. You’ve seen the fucker fight. Sherry, maybe. She’s done it before with Dwighty-Boy. But Y/N? No.” Negan shook his head at Simon. “She’s with one of them or both of them. Daryl seems the type to take pity and help out people, so I doubt he would have left them. Especially when he encountered Y/N. She’s the one I’m most worried about.”

Simon looked thoughtful before saying, “They could’ve gone to another compound.”

“I highly doubt Gregory would take in one of Rick’s people. Ezekiel…” Negan paused, thinking. “Maybe. But, I don’t think so. Fucker is crazy. I don’t think Sherry would put up with that fucking shit for a moment.”

He shot Simon a look and asked, “Rick look nervous?”

“He never looks nervous.”

“I would have to disagree with that,” Negan pointed out. “Did you see him shitting his pants when I was going to make him cut off Carl’s fucking hand?”

Simon laughed, “Right. Well, he was actually quite cheeky. Telling me they would go out right then to find us some stuff. Sucking up.”

“He’s protecting his group,” Negan said. “I respect that. Swallowing his hate.”

“Didn’t seem to know that Daryl was missing,” Simon commented.

Negan pondered this before saying, “Maybe he really doesn’t know that he’s gone. And he doesn’t know where he’s at. I don’t fucking believe it for a goddamn second but maybe. But where the fucking fuck would that shithead have gone otherwise?”

Shrugging, Simon stated, “He might still be out there. Maybe he’s not a dumbass.”

Chewing on his bottom lip, Negan looked deep in thought. He wiped his face and said, “But then that means that Y/N and Sherry might still be out there.” He shook his head, looking worried. “Christ.”

“I’m sure they’re fine.”

“Better fucking hope so,” Negan muttered under his breath.

Simon sighed before saying, “I gotta help them unload some shit.”

Waving him off, Negan said, “Go then.”

Simon left and Negan stared off across the field past the walkers up against the fence. He couldn’t keep wasting time and resources searching for them. But, he also was not going to put up with that kind of betrayal. He knew deep down Sherry had to have been the one to make the decision and she drug Y/N along.

His fingers stroked the locket in his pocket. He hadn’t taken it off his person since Dwight had brought it back.

He was actually worried. He vowed he wouldn’t be too hard on Y/N if they found her. Just that she came back.


	4. Chapter 4

You had been at the Kingdom for a few days before Rick showed back up. And informed you that you and Daryl were going to be moving to the Hilltop to relieve Ezekiel. He didn’t seem like he was under too much stress, always trying to keep the two of you company whenever he was free. He was hospitable and hid his anxiousness, if he had it, well. You had thanked him for his generosity before you had left.

Daryl had still not warmed up to you completely and you didn’t expect him to. He was not the easiest person to get to trust you. It was going to take some work. And you were prepared to put the work in because you knew how strong he was and how loyal he was. If you could prove yourself, you’d have an amazing ally.

The Hilltop was different than the Kingdom. Two of Rick’s own were there permanently, working with the leader, Gregory. One of the women, Maggie, was believed to be dead by Negan, so that had to be kept a secret along with you and Daryl. You didn’t ask why he thought she was dead and why it was a secret. You just were grateful for the shelter.

Rick had decided to bring you two here because Simon and some of the Saviors had already been to Alexandria. Alexandria blatantly looking for Daryl – and you by extension. And then a regular trip to the Hilltop. Where they had peaked a bit more around, which Maggie and Sasha had decided was because of you and Daryl. The Kingdom may be next, regardless if Negan’s men never stepped inside.

He had brought some people you hadn’t seen before and you were eager to learn their names. You wanted to assimilate into this group and being around them often was the quickest way. You made to walk towards Rick but stalled. There was a new woman walking up to the group. She regarded you, hesitantly before tearing her eyes away to look at Rick. Your eyes ran over her face and then quickly over her body. There was an instant attraction. At least on your end.

The woman, on the other hand, was focused on Rick. “How’d it go?”

“Fine. Found some guns,” Rick told her curtly. She didn’t seem insulted by his quick dismissal and you figured it was because whatever they were talking about was supposed to be kept under wraps.

You lingered nearby as everyone greeted each other. You didn’t want to interrupt and be too nosy.

But, your heart leapt when the woman began her way towards you, a determined look in her eyes. Keep yourself together, you told yourself.

Her greeting, “So, you are one of his wives.”

You corrected lightly, “Were.”

“Are,” she corrected you back. “By the way that Rick is talking.”

There was nothing malicious about what she was saying with her tone, just truth. Nodding, you admitted, “Are.”

Tara eyed you curiously and asked, “Why are you running from him?”

Snorting slightly, you asked teasingly, “You met him?”

“Not yet. Fortunately. He’s even that bad to you?”

Shifting uncomfortably, you answered resentfully, “Well… no. I mean, he treats us like… like we’re his, of course.” You didn’t miss the upset look on her face. “And by that I mean he likes us at his beck and call. But he’s never hit any of us… never forced us. He has an abhorrence for rape. Killed a couple of his men for attempting it. He’s got some standards and brings us gifts and keeps us well.”

Tara sensed you weren’t done finishing your thoughts. “But…”

Sighing heavily, you stated, “But… I don’t feel the same as him about the way he tries to run the place.”

“Course he doesn’t listen to you girls, right?” You shook your head and she scoffed. “Sorry… that seems pretty… barbaric and rigged by patriarchy.”

A snort left your mouth and you quickly covered your mouth. “Sorry,” you apologized. “Just haven’t heard someone speak that bluntly about his bullshit.”

“You don’t ever have to worry about passive from me,” Tara responded.

Smiling you told her, “That’s actually reassuring. But also reminds me of Negan.”

“Well, passive without the asshole.”

This drew a laugh from you. She was witty and you appreciated that. It added to your allure of her. She smiled at your laugh and you felt butterflies.

“You have a nice laugh,” she told you, smiling.

This only made you blush and drew another nervous laugh out of you. Something crossed her face, noting your bashfulness. She pulled it back quickly but you had noted it nonetheless.

“Thanks,” you told her, brushing a stray piece of hair behind your ear.

“Yeah…” she said, trailing off. There were a few moments of silence before she asked, “So, you’re here to take on Negan?” You nodded and she asked, “He must have talked about Rick a lot then to make you think that Rick was the right place to go.”

“He has some respect for Rick.” Tara cocked an eyebrow and you nodded, “He’s got something for people who put others before themselves. That’s what he is imagining he is doing. He believes he has the burden of taking care of the meek and weak. That’s how you reestablish the world.”

Tara quipped, “He’s doing a shit job.”

“I know.”

Her eyes ran over you slowly before she informed you, “Well, it’s good you came to your senses.”

“Wouldn’t have met you otherwise,” you word vomited and instantly wanted to punch yourself in the face. Why were you not in control of your emotions and what you were saying. You had been praising yourself for the past – god knows how long – for your ability to pass yourself off as weak to Negan, want him to keep you close and under his wing. Make him develop a want for you. And now, here you were making yourself a fool in front of this woman who you just met.

Tara on the other hand, actually looked pleased, maybe even shy. Chuckling, she managed to respond, “Didn’t know if it was that much of a pleasure.”

You’d already gotten yourself in this far. What harm would it do?

“It was,” you responded evenly.

Her eyes met yours and god you would be lying if you said you didn’t feel electricity. Your gaze was locked for a few moments, the other waiting for the other one to break down and admit whatever it took to bring forth what you knew she was feeling as well as what you were feeling. You had gained enough control back over yourself to know that it wouldn’t be you. At least right now. You needed some guard.

Relenting, Tara stated, “Glad to know I’m that interesting.” You smirked at this and she said, “I do have to do some work while I’m here. Not that I’m not enjoying your company. Just…”

“Need to earn your keep,” you stated, repeating words Negan had said to new and old people in his group alike without thinking. But thank god, it seemed to fit the situation. Still, you felt… off repeating his words when he wasn’t here.

Tara nodded in agreement, “Exactly, Y/N.”

Hearing her say your name sent a shiver through your body. And all you wanted was for her to keep saying your name. And keep close. But you knew this moment was ending. Even though you knew that this wouldn’t be the last moment you two would share if you had the say in it.

“Well, I don’t want to keep you,” you stated. “Thank you for coming up to me. It means a lot. Most people have been avoiding me because of… well, you know. Negan.”

Tara acknowledged this before saying, “I don’t like to judge people off of what other people are saying. And if Rick and Michonne trust you well enough at this point, that’s good enough for me.” She ran her eyes over you one more time before stating, “I’ll see you next time.”

She sounded so sure.

“Yeah,” you nodded, feeling happy.


	5. Chapter 5

Tara found you later in the evening and sat down next to you on the porch of the house you were going to be staying in. She looked over her shoulder and stated, “You chose a good one.”

“Yeah?”

Nodding, Tara told you, “Olivia liked it a lot. She kept it up well.”

“Olivia?”

Tara shifted and stated, “She’s not here anymore.”

There was more to the story that she wasn’t telling you for whatever reason – they more than likely had been close considering her expression – and you were not going to press her on it. You simply stated, “Then I’ll have to keep it up too.”

This drew a smile out of Tara and she asked, “Did you eat dinner yet?”

You shook your head, grateful she had asked you. You were afraid to ask about dinner and food in general for that matter. You knew it was scarce, Rick had said so. But, he’d told you that he would come get you when he was free to go to the pantry to grab a bit of supplies for you to keep. It surprised you he was going to trust you with taking some of their food into a house by yourself when you could run with it.

Furrowing her brow, Tara commented, “You must be starving.”

That was true. You’d always had enough food in the Sanctuary, so going without a regular schedule of food was new to you again. You’d gotten used to being pampered or what could be described as pampered in these trying times.

“Come on,” she told you standing up. “You can come over to my place. I’m sure I can whip something up.”

Your heart was beating fast as you got up to follow her. You felt silly, getting excited about going over to her house. You were an adult, not a teenager who’d never even kissed someone, when going over to someone’s house was a big deal. Nevertheless, you were excited, following her down the street towards her place.

“Where were you at before this? I mean, before the Sanctuary.”

“We were visiting in Memphis.”

“That’s a bit far from here,” Tara commented and then inquired, “We?”

The words came to you easier than you thought they would, “A few friends and I.”

You didn’t need to say any more for her to understand what had happened. You’re sure she had gone through the same thing, as well as everyone else here.

“Visiting though? Where from?”

“Y/C,” you answered.

“Oh, shit, I went there for a vacation with my girlfriend a few years back!”

Girlfriend. You hadn’t read the signals going back and forth between the two of you wrong. It took a lot of effort to hide the huge smile trying to break out from inside you. Instead, you nodded, trying to be nonchalant about the whole situation. “Cool,” you simply said. And then you internally scolded yourself for saying something lacking wit.

Tara didn’t seem to notice. She just smiled shyly and nodded, “Yeah. It was. We had a good time. She always said that she wanted to go back there. I wonder what she’d say about it now. I don’t know if that would be such a good idea now.”

You felt bad feeling relieved that she was hinting that her girlfriend was not here anymore.

“Probably not,” you admitted as she moved down the pathway towards a house and you followed her. “Traveling isn’t all that safe.”

Tara snorted opening the screen door and holding it open for you, “And you thought it wasn’t before.”

This statement was greeted with a heartful chuckle from you and you walked into her living room, waiting for her to direct you.

<> <> <>

“By myself?” You were honestly nervous to stay alone in the house. Before, it would not have seemed like such a large place; it reminded you of your childhood home. But when the world went to shit, you’d remained in such small quarters with so many people, it was going to be alien to you to have that much space to yourself. And it didn’t seem safe. Not that you didn’t trust their infrastructure but anything could happen. And if you were alone if something did happen…

Tara shifted in her seat, looking a bit flustered, and offered avoiding eye contact a bit, “You can stay in one of the rooms in my place. I’m living by myself currently.” Her eyes flicked to you, a hopeful look in her eyes. “That’s if, if you’re worried about being alone.”

Relief flooded you and you admitted, “I am… I haven’t been alone for awhile.”

“It sucks,” Tara responded.

You took the last bite of your food and swallowed. “You sure you’re okay with me being in here?”

“Why wouldn’t I be?”

“Just seems like you should take longer to trust me,” you said quietly.

There were a few moments of silence and you were worried you had something wrong. That you had made her actually think about what she was offering and she would agree, and you would find yourself sleeping alone. You didn’t want her to push you away.

“I was on the opposite side of the field than them at one point.”

Your eyes widened a little meeting her gaze. This news surprised you. “Oh?”

Tara nodded and stated, “It wasn’t the best choice I ever made. Following the guy I did. But, it did lead me to this group. Just had to go through a bunch of bullshit before I did.” She paused, looking down at her bowl and twirled her spoon around. Exhaling, she told you, “Which is why I was and am willing to give you a chance. I know what it feels like to come from the other side and have good intentions and not have people trust you. It’s for good reason for people to be wary about trusting others but you just need someone to give you a chance.”

You said nothing, surprised into silence. You were grateful she was extending the olive branch and willing to give you a chance. And you were elated it happened to be her that was the one willing to do it. Her eyes sparkled a little watching your surprised reaction.

Joking, she told you, “Plus, I’m not Daryl. You don’t need to go through three trials and a blood rite for me to trust you.”

“He’s not that bad,” you told her.

Tara snorted, “Right.” She stood up from the seat and grabbed her bowl and gestured at yours. “You done?” You nodded and she took it from you.

You watched her retreating back to the sink, the way her clothes moved around her frame, her hair swaying gently.

“Wanna grab your stuff and bring it over here?” Tara asked, turning around, interrupting your thoughts. You don’t know how long you were staring at her and you sat up straight, clearing your throat. She noticed and gave you a curious look.

Giving her a curt nod, you said, “Yeah, that’s probably a good idea.”

<> <> <>

The first morning after moving in, Rick had come into Tara’s house in a bit of a rush, asking if Tara had seen you and stopped mid-sentence, trailing off when he found the two of you eating breakfast at her table. He’d asked you where your stuff was and when you said it was upstairs, he seemed slightly surprised. It had relaxed him instantly to find you and you suspected he had gone to check on you and upon finding your things missing, had gone into a panic thinking you had bolted. You supposed you should have told him your plan to avoid that but hindsight was 20/20.

Tara and you had hit it off quickly, her more than willing to teach you the ropes around Alexandria. She taught you the schedules, how to arm the different types of weapons that they still managed to have after Negan had taken the majority of them, and general rules of the place.

More than once you had caught Rick, Michonne, and Daryl watching the pair of you. Rick had been more in amusement than anything, seeming pleased you had merged in smoothly. Michonne you couldn’t tell her feeling about it but she had warmed up to you a little, so you figured it couldn’t be too bad. Daryl though, still seemed to not trust you. He’d made small comments that had rubbed you the wrong way but Tara had told him to fuck off a couple times. He’d narrowed his eyes at her but that was the extent he had retaliated at her.

You were still determined to get him to like you so you tried your best to help him whenever you could. The closest he had come to thanking you was grunting in a less aggressive manner when you had handed him a fresh bottle of water the previous day while he worked on one of the cars.

The car that you and Tara had taken out today. She was taking you on your first run to get supplies. As much as you felt Rick trusted you, he still seemed on edge when she mentioned to him the two of you were planning to go out and asked if he wanted anything in particular looked for while you were out. He didn’t verbally forbid it though and you wondered what Tara would have said if he had tried.

A camp had presented itself to the pair of you as you walked through the woods. You were closer to the Sanctuary than you had been in almost a month and you were nervous about it. But, you wanted to prove yourself to Tara.

Tara separated off from you and you moved towards the abandoned car, careful to continue checking your surroundings. There was no one in the car – human or walker – or underneath it and it looked like it had been ransacked already. You still dug around in the backseat and found a few unopened bottles of water and matches. Better than nothing, you thought as you stuck them in your backpack.

There was a crack in the woods behind you and you quickly looked behind you before ducking down by the car. You slowed your breathing, trying to be as quiet as possible, readying to jump out and kill the walker.

It was coming closer and you readied your knife.

Jumping up you were mid momentum to drive it into the walker’s head when you saw the face of the person and their clear eyes. They weren’t dead.

You caught yourself jumping back, your heart hammering from the adrenaline but also from fear. It was Peter. One of Negan’s men. Your stomach dropped when you realized he for sure recognized you.

When he recovered from his initial shock, his face broke out slowly into a pleased smile.

“Well, well, well,” Peter intoned, walking closer to you. He stopped on a dime when he noticed the knife in your hand. His eyes flicked back up to meet yours and he smiled. “You are a sight for sore eyes, Y/N. Thought you were dead, darling.”

“Well. I’m not.”

Peter chuckled, “I can see that. Where’s Sherry?” His eyes scanned around you quickly before landing on you again.

“I don’t know.”

“You lying to me?”

“No. We split up weeks ago.”

He looked unconvinced but asked, “Why’d you do that?”

“Different plans I guess.”

Peter simpered and sighed dramatically. “Well, damn. At least I found you. Negan’s been worried sick, darling.”

Swallowing sharply, you responded, “I’m sure he has been. You can tell him I’m alright though and he can stop worrying.”

Peter clicked his tongue and informed you, “You can tell him yourself. You’re gonna come with us.”

Us? Damnit. Of course Peter wasn’t alone.

Still, you retorted forcefully, “Like hell I am!”

This surprised him and he rose his eyebrows at you. He switched tactics, “Where ya staying? Can’t be out here on your own looking as clean as you do.”

“None of your damn business.”

Peter tsked and stepped closer, causing your free hand move towards your gun holstered on your hip. He noticed and smirked slightly. “You gonna try to shoot me? You ever shot a gun before?”

Instead of giving yourself away about the experience you had – he didn’t know any better than Negan that you were trained – you told him, “I’m learning quickly.”

“I’m sure you are.” The smile on his face was condescending. “You really hurt his feelings, Y/N. He’ll forgive you though if you come back. He’s said that. He just wants you to be safe.”

“I’ve been doing fine,” you said firmly.

Peter narrowed his eyes slightly and asked, “You’re not going to do this the easy way, are you?” You said nothing in response and he sighed heavily. “Don’t be stupid, Y/N. You’re safer with Negan and you know it. I don’t want to have to be handsy but if you force my hand…”

There was the sound of the gun being cocked and Tara’s cool voice, “I’d love to see you try.”

You choked hearing her voice, shocked she was risking showing herself to Peter. If he ever saw her in Alexandria, he would recognize her immediately and it would be over. You snapped your head to look over at her and relief flooded through you when you saw she had covered the bottom part of her face with fabric and her hood on her jacket was up, only revealing her eyes.

Peter looked between the two of you and he gave you a small smile, “Knew you couldn’t be by yourself. Frail little thing like you. It’s laughable you tried to pass it off as if you were.” He straightened up and looked at Tara. “How about this? You both come with me. Our leader –” It bothered you that he referred to Negan as your leader still. “is always welcoming people.

Tara retorted, “Fat chance, fucker.”

Before the three of you could move on, there was movement in the bushes behind Peter. And he turned his head and your stomach sank even further, seeing a couple more of Negan’s men. But, in a split second, your eyes widened seeing the look on their faces.

“We gotta go!” One – you thought his name was Oliver – hissed at Peter, grasping at his arm. “There’s a herd coming. Too big. I don’t want to deal with it.”

“I’m dealing with something,” Peter snarled and he gestured over towards you and Tara.

Oliver’s eyes and the other man’s eyes widened seeing you. Peter looked back at you, “You hear that, Y/N? Herd coming. You sure you two wanna go at it alone?” He shot Tara a look before directing at you again, “Or do you want to come back with us? I think you know what Negan would want you to do.”

Yes, you did. He would want you to cower and crawl back into his arms to warm his bed. At the price of giving up personal freedom, you could be protected again and have all your needs met.

You shook your head furiously. “No.”

Peter looked pissed at this point, “Stop playing games, Y/N. He’s gonna find you eventually and the sooner you come back, the easier it’ll be.”

Nothing more was said because a walker came through the brush line into the camp and Tara used this distraction to grab your arm and pull you towards her and away. You knew behind your back Peter had raised his gun at the two of you and probably decided at the last second to not shoot. Negan would kill him for harming you with a bullet and it would also draw more walkers.

Tara and you made it back to your truck off the side of the road down the way quicker than you expected. Your blood was pumping in your ears as you approached it, thinking of nothing but getting back behind Alexandria’s walls.

“Shit!” you cursed to yourself angrily, throwing yourself into the truck and hitting the dashboard. “He’s gonna tell him!”

“We’re not close to Alexandria,” Tara said, trying to be reasonable, starting up the truck. She hadn’t taken the bandana off her face which was probably smart in case one or all of them followed and saw her face. “He won’t know where you are staying.”

Tears pricked at your eyes, your emotions finally hitting you full blast. “But he’ll know I’m alive.”

“I’m sure that’ll put him at ease.”

“And fuel his fire to find me even more,” you responded, rubbing your face, trying to not cry.

Tara looked over at you sympathetically before putting the car in drive. You stared out the window as she pulled out from the road onto the main one. You both were breathing heavily, all the running catching up to you as your adrenaline subsided. You could feel your lungs struggling to keep up with the amount of breath you needed.

Gradually, your body calmed down and you heard Tara’s breathing evening out as well.

After a few moments of quiet between the two of you, you said quietly, “Thanks for saving my ass.”

“Seemed like a prick.” You snorted looking over at her and she defended herself, “Well, he did! Isn’t he?”

“Yeah… he is.”

Another pause before Tara asked, “You find anything?”

“A few bottles of water and some matches. You?”

“Six cans of vegetables. Surprised I could still run that fast with them in my bag.”

You sighed, “At least it wasn’t a complete waste of a trip.”

Tara reached over, her hand landing on yours. Your heart skipped a beat as she squeezed gently, giving you a reassuring smile. “It’ll be fine.” You wanted to believe her so desperately and for her sake, you gave her a nod, a small smile on your face.

<> <> <>

Peter burst into the game room, his eyes scanning quickly. He hadn’t even bothered to change out of his dirty, walker-gut covered clothes when they got back. He wanted to find Negan and tell him himself.

“You look and smell like shit, Peter,” Negan told him as Peter rushed up to him.

Peter ignored the jab, telling him point blank. “I saw her. Y/N.”

This caught Negan’s attention instantly, him sitting upright quickly. “Where the fuck at?”

“A few miles east. Crazy she didn’t move farther away. But, she’s clean. She’s gotta be staying somewhere. Had another girl with her. Bitch didn’t have a problem raising a gun to my head to protect Y/N.”

“Sherry?”

Peter shook his head, “No, I woulda recognized her voice. But, she refused to come back with us. Even with my good diplomatic skills.”

Negan demanded, “She refused to come back or Y/N did?”

Reluctantly, Peter told him, “Both.” He shifted uncomfortably under Negan’s infuriated look before saying, “Y/N claims she’s doing fine.”

“Like hell,” Negan snapped, a dark cloud passing over his face.

“That’s what I said. She told me just to tell you she’s alright to put you at ease. Told her she should come back and do it herself and she said no. Must have made good friends with that girl she’s with.”

There were a few moments of silence before Negan swung Lucille down, slamming her into the table. She bounced off and he kicked himself away from the table.

“And ya couldn’t have fucking grabbed her, dick for brains?” Negan spat.

“She was armed.”

If Negan’s eyes could have rolled out of his head, they would have. “Like you can’t fucking take her down. She doesn’t even know how to shoot a fucking gun!”

“Told me she’s been practicing.” Negan snorted, looking annoyed, shaking his head. Peter pressed, “Plus, the other bitch had a gun pointed at me straight on.”

Negan rubbed his face angrily, placing Lucille on the table. He placed both of his hands palm down on the table, leaning on them, looking deep in thought. It was quiet in the room, everyone watching him intently.

“I think we need to do another round around the camps,” he finally said. “Surprise ones. Alexandria and the Hill Top. Especially with those fuckers threatening me. I think they’re conspiring against me – which is a goddamn stupid idea – and I will not have Y/N caught in the crossfire if some bullshit happens to fucking go down.”

With that, he picked up Lucille and moved towards the exit to go talk to Simon.


	6. Chapter 6

“I can leave,” you spoke up, interrupting the intense debate going on around you.

As soon as you and Tara had come back to tell them about what had happened out on the road, a meeting had been called about safety. You knew it was going to happen. Tara had been optimistic about it but you knew how people would react. Tara was only being positive because she wanted and hoped for the best for you. You admired her for it but she was blinded. By what you hoped was at least a crush.

You’d tried not to admit it to yourself for a few days upon living with her but the feeling had creeped into your bones. And she had reflected them back to you. Despite the distance you were trying to keep, you warmed at her jumping in.

“No, that’s ridiculous!” Tara responded immediately, shaking her head.

“It’s not,” Michonne shot back, her eyes piercing Tara. She had been mostly quiet throughout the discussion but she spoke up now.

Tara looked around the group, scoffing. “You’re really going to be bullied into sending Y/N back to The Kingdom because we saw some assholes out on the road? We weren’t close to here!”

Michonne again, “Yeah but Negan’s not stupid enough to not check around, even if it’s far. Especially since those guys are mentioning that he’s still looking for her.”

Throwing her hands out, Tara looked back at you and you could only give her a sad look in return. You knew Negan. If you had been gone this long and he was still looking for you, that was not a good sign. You were an item he lost. If you had told him you didn’t want to be his wife and then left, without stealing from him, it would have been different. But, you had been his wife. You had been his. He wasn’t going to let that go. Plus, he had invested a lot in you… emotionally, sexually, and materially.

She didn’t look impressed by your response.

“It’s not good,” Rick pressed on, picking up where Michonne had left off. “It’s going to bring it right back here to Alexandria. Look, I know it was a risk from the get go and I’m not regretting my decision. But, we need to be flexible and react to changes. This changes things.”

When he looked to you, you had a feeling at what he wanted.

Pushing yourself up out of the chair, you immediately cut in when Tara was going to protest. “It’s fine. I know everyone will make a smart decision.”

“But –”

You grasped her hand and squeezed it. “I’ll be outside. It’s better.”

She looked like she wanted to say more, standing there gaping like a fish before closing her mouth. You smiled softly before walking towards the door, sparing Rick a glance. He was watching you intently as you exited.

As soon as you had left, Rick turned towards Tara and put his hands on his hips.

Rolling her eyes, Tara snapped, “Oh, don’t give me that alpha shit, Rick.”

“I’m not. I’m trying to reason with you.”

“There’s no reasoning when you’re all talking crazy! It’s only because you’re scared.”

Daryl cut in, “Fear keeps you safe. Do you not remember that?”

“She’s been gone from Negan for more than a month. He’ll lose interest!”

Rick argued, “Doesn’t seem like it. He doesn’t like losing. You’ve seen that.”

“It’s only been two goddamn weeks or so that she’s been around, Tara –” Daryl tried to cut in but she clapped back.

“That’s a hell of a long time in this world and you know it.”

Daryl closed his mouth and glared her down. Tara shook her head at Daryl as Rick took a step closer to her, “Look, I don’t like it any more than you do. And I know you guys have been getting close and that’s great, especially after Denise.” Tara flinched a bit and Rick softened his tone, “I want that for you, we all want that for you. But, we have to think about the group as a whole, Tara. And Y/N gets that.”

Jaw set, Tara stared back at Rick before her eyes moved around the group. She was grinding her teeth, mulling over something before relenting and stating, “Fine. But I’m going with her.”

“And leave this place short one more person?” Daryl asked with an incredulous tone.

“If we all decide her leaving is the best for now, shoving her off to some place where she doesn’t know anyone isn’t going to build more trust between her and us. You’re smarter than that, Daryl,” Tara responded, her tone sour. “You’ve experienced that!” Daryl scoffed, looking away from her and Tara knew she had gotten under his skin about Negan stealing him away and trying to force him to join the Saviors. It hadn’t panned out well. She added just for good measure, “It’s not like I’m going to leave forever.”

Rick was contemplating what she said and Tara said to him, “You trust Ezekiel. So, we will be fine.”

Chewing on his lip for a few more moments, Rick avoided eye contact with her. Finally, he looked at her and gave a stiff nod.

<> <> <>

You were sitting in the living room when Tara walked back into the house. From the look on her face, you could tell that something had not gone the way that she had wanted it to. And you knew what it was. You were expecting it.

Gesturing towards the table, you told her, “I made you some lemonade?”

Sighing loudly, she trudged to the couch and forced a smile. She bent over to grab the glass and sat down, taking a long drink out of the glass.

After swallowing, she gave a little laugh, looking at the glass. Furrowing your brow, you inquired, “What?”

“Ah… it’s…,” Tara started before making eye contact. “Negan loves the lemonade.” Your face immediately fell, and she quickly said, “I don’t mean… it’s just… circumstance. He always asked for it to be made while he was here. And now they are wanting to push you back out because of him. And then you make this lemonade…”

She was starting to cry.

Your eyes widening, you quickly put down your glass and leaned in closer. “Tara?”

Suddenly, her lips were on yours. Her kiss was desperate and needy, pulling you closer to her. At first you were shocked, your eyes wide open as she moved against you. But that only lasted a few moments before you fell into the kiss, your hand wrapping around her head and securing her there.

This is what you had dreamed of since you had laid eyes on her and now that it was happening, you were lost in the moment. It was not ideal circumstance but the fact that it was happening at all was sending electricity through your entire body.

Tara deepened the kiss, pushing you back onto the couch, her hands searching. Her hands traveled you freely as you moved your arms out and grasped the sides of her face. Your breathing and her breathing began to match the others, gasping for air against the desperation for contact.

The kisses slowed, the rush of adrenaline waning.

On the last kiss, you pulled away and looked deep into her eyes. They were blown with arousal and you guessed yours mirrored hers. Running a hand down her face, you said quietly, “I suspect I’m being sent away from you.” She sucked in her cheeks before turning her head down. You forced her head back up and said, “It doesn’t matter.”

“Why?”

“You stood up for me. Against your family. That’s enough. That’s more than enough.”

She looked contemplative. You knew part of it had to do with the fact you had not responded negatively or at least shocked to her advancement.

Pushing herself away, she sunk back into the couch and ground her teeth gently, deep in thought. You watched her in silence, waiting for her to make a decision on whatever was running through her mind.

“I’m going to go with you.”

Raising your eyebrows, you stammered, “W-what?”

“I’ve already told them. Rick is reluctant but he didn’t fight me too much on it.”

“Are you sure?”

Her gaze was piercing when she told you, “Yes.”

<> <> <>

_“You want that pussy to be owned? By me, sweetheart?” Negan growled from behind you._

__

__

_Grasping the blankets, you braced yourself for his thrusts. As your fingers laced around the fabric, you gasped out, “Yes. Please!”_

__

__

_His fingers dug into your hips, his thrusts increasing. “You’re a goddamn queen, baby.”_

__

__

_You sure as hell didn’t feel like a queen, pinned underneath him, after waiting for days for him to call on you to fulfill your duty to remain on his wife list…_

Blinking your eyes, you snapped back to reality. You were in a car and leaning against the door, your head resting on the window. You were riding with Tara in the car to take you the Kingdom. You thought your body was fighting against this, making you remember what it was like with Negan. No matter the fact that the Kingdom was never infiltrated by Saviors, maybe your subconscious was trying to warn you. And if it was dangerous, you didn’t want Tara there.

“You don’t have to stay there with me. Ezekiel will treat me just fine,” you repeated for the millionth time in the past twenty-four hours.

Tara sighed and said, “I thought we were over discussing it.”

“Rick has his head in the right place. It might not be his heart – on my part, at least – but his head is in the right place. And that’s what keeps you alive today.”

She was silent, and you reached out tentatively, heat coursing through your body at the bold move, and you touched her hand on the steering wheel. You felt her tense a little and she looked at you quickly before you moved your fingers down, intertwining with hers. Your kiss had been charged, wanton… it had been something the two of you had been wanting to pursue. You were glad she had, and this touch was affirming that.

Giving her a small smile when she did not retreat, you told her, “You keep me alive today, Tara. You’ve helped with that in so many ways. I don’t know –”

You were cut off when the car suddenly swerved and Tara cursed loudly as she gripped the steering wheel, trying to keep the car going straight. You gripped handle of the door as Tara got control of the car again. A tire couldn’t have blown because there wasn’t enough noise when the car had jerked.

“What the fuck?” Tara whispered, thinking out loud rather than expecting an answer. She moved into action, unbuckling her seatbelt and throwing the door open to check out the damage.

You followed her actions and saw that the two front tires were deflated. Whipping your head back down the road, you zoned in on the strip.

“We need –” you tried to tell Tara before loud whistling interrupted you.

You knew that whistling.

Whipping around you turned to face Simon coming out from behind a tree, with other men as well.

You heard a scuffle behind you and Tara grunting and you turned to see her gun on the ground and a man holding her with a knife to her throat.

“You are an elusive little thing, Y/N,” Simon taunted, wiggling his fingers at you, catching your attention again. You stood your ground, keeping eye contact with him. He let out a chuckle and said, “Been making us run in circles for over a month. And for what? Negan treated you good. Hell, he treats you girls the best out of everyone at home. So, why are you going and causing trouble?”

Changing the subject, you asked, “You trying to catch something with the spike strip?”

“Obviously,” Simon told you and pointed at you. The men around him chuckled and you narrowed your eyes, waiting for an explanation. “Petey boy said he saw you around here. Just got lucky that we chose today to do this road. Negan’s visiting the masses today to scope out where you’re at.” Your stomach tightened, knowing that Negan was going to be bothering Rick and the rest of the people at Alexandria over you. Pulling out his walkie, Simon replied, “I guess I can cut that off short now that I’ve got the prize.”

The walkie’s static was only a few moments before Simon said into it, “Joshua. Paul. Bring the trucks. Found your bird, Negan. Out on Henney, around mile mark 65. She’s calmly going back in the cage. Over.”

“No, I’m not!” You spat at him, your fists clenching as he lowered the walkie.

“Don’t make me have to work for this, Y/N. I’ve got a bunch of shit to do today and trying to subdue a woman isn’t on my docket.”

“It’s going to be!”

Sighing annoyed, Simon looked over at one of the guys who you didn’t recognize and gestured towards you. “What are you waiting for?”

The guy advanced on you and you glanced at the open car door, debating about trying to fight him – which you would lose, this guy was huge, not to mention the two of you were surrounded – or diving for your gun that was sitting on the middle console to at least injure a few. That was your best chance, regardless if you turned your back on him.

Dashing, your blood was pumping in your ears, knowing damn well the guy was running now. You dove into the car, your hand falling on the gun. Whipping around just as he came up, you shot – so close which was a mistake – the sound deafening you. You couldn’t hear his scream but he was yelling something fierce. You knew you’d hit him but he kept coming, pistol whipping you across the face. He forced the gun out of your hand by slamming your hands against the dash and the gun clattered to the floor of the truck.

Kicking at him blindly, your legs were caught and you were pulled from the truck. You saw Tara laying on the ground, her face bleeding, unconscious. The guy who had had her was dead and you knew she had tried to get an upper hand as well but someone else had knocked her out. Despite the losing battle, you struggled with the two guys, fury and terror running through you at the same time.

“Tara!” you screeched as you were pulled into the back of the SUV. Simon slammed the door close and immediately pointed a gun at your head.

You quit fighting immediately, staring down the barrel of the gun. Tears stung at your eyes, the sinking feeling in your chest deepening as the car took off quickly.

“Now, now,” Simon scolded you mockingly, keeping the gun on you. “We’re gonna have a nice car ride. Got a good child lock system back here, comfy seats, a nice glock aimed between those doe eyes… recipe for a calm ride. Right?” You clenched your jaw, a tear escaping and running down your cheek. Simon rose his eyebrows and prodded more forcefully, “Right, Y/N?”

Forcing yourself to talk, you husked out, “Right.”

He cocked his head to the side and looked at the wound on your cheek and huffed angrily. “That fucking idiot. I didn’t mean for you to get hurt, Y/N. And I’m sure Negan’ll throw a goddamn fit.”

You finally felt the blood on your face but refused to wipe it off. You didn’t care what Negan did. All you wanted to know is if Tara was okay.

Turning your head, you looked out the back window where your truck was disappearing.

“Don’t worry, love. Your friend is coming too.”

<> <> <>

“Ya seem standoffish, doll,” Negan commented, Lucille at his side.

You were standing by the doorway where Simon had left you and closed the door behind you. Negan was standing next to the long table in the center of the room, his eyes lit seeing you standing in front of him. He hadn’t advanced on you yet and you assumed it was because he’d been told what you’d done to his man and he was being cautious. You didn’t doubt he was stalking you too, trying to make your anxiety rise to wonder what he was going to do. It was working.

Still, you told him, “You had your people kidnap me.”

“‘Your people?’ Don’t you mean our people?” You said nothing, and Negan cocked his head to the side. Slapping his hand on the table, he ordered, “Sit.”

Something told you to listen to what he said, so you moved towards the table, pulled the chair out, and sat down, keeping your eyes on him the whole time.

Negan sat opposite of you, putting his feet up on the table, Lucille resting in his lap. He cut to the chase, “Where’s our lovely Sherry?”

“I don’t know.”

“You don’t know?”

“No. We split up weeks ago.”

Negan paused for a moment before he asked, “You let Daryl out?”

“Not technically.”

Negan smirked and said, “You either did or you didn’t, baby.”

You cringed slightly at him calling you that but you kept your face straight as you answered, “Then, no. I didn’t.”

“What was the technicality? I’m curious.”

“I walked out of the place with him. I don’t know how he got out of the cell though.”

Negan chewed on this for a moment, “What’d Sherry fucking promise you, sweetheart? To convince you to leave?”

You refused to tell him that she wouldn’t have had to convince you of anything, you would have asked her to go even if she hadn’t offered. Answering just to appease him, you said, “Freedom.”

This caught Negan’s attention and he narrowed his eyes slightly, looking at you closely. “You didn’t feel free?”

“No.”

“Why?”

“Everything I did had to be approved by you and you alone.”

“So, you left on purpose… to go to my goddamn nemesis. How the fucking plot thickens.”

You didn’t miss the scorn in his voice. He must have recognized Tara or someone who had been to Alexandria had and he had figured out where you had been. “I wasn’t going towards him in particular. Just away from here.”

Negan retorted, “If you were so unhappy, you shoulda just fucking told me, sweetheart.”

You got bold, “As if you would have listened. Or was it just a slip of the tongue every time when you called me your favorite?”

“Shit, that woulda made me listen to you even more.” He paused before adding with a smirk, “Granted, I wouldn’t have let another fuckwad around here touch you if you had decided to not be my wife anymore. Would have fucking rubbed me the wrong way.”

“Exactly.”

Negan simpered, “So, you didn’t like being in the wives’ club anymore, so you let Sherry break the two of you out and you went and found Rick – who sucks some major ass – and decided to live on fucking Colonial Street with him and his band of ragtag fucks.” He shot you a look and asked, “How’s that working out?”

“It was working fine,” you replied stiffly.

“That hurts my feelings, baby.”

“I just wanted to contribute to a community and I knew I couldn’t do that here.”

“You were contributing to this community just fine,” Negan retorted and your stomach twisted at him insinuating heating his bed was an important part of keeping this place running.

A few moments of silence fell between the two of you as you looked down at your hands, wringing them slightly. No matter how much you tried to pretend he didn’t put you on edge, he did. And you knew he knew that he did and you could only imagine the self-satisfied smirk on his face.

“Well, now that that awkwardness is out of the way… may we leave?” you asked, foolish enough to believe he would comply.

He’d let others go who didn’t want to be there anymore, as long as they didn’t steal from him. There was nothing that you needed. You hadn’t technically stolen from him when you left. You and Sherry had stock piled food, choosing to skip meals and trade them for cans of food. The people you had done it with had obviously not squealed – or simply not connected the dots – otherwise Negan would have had mentioned it now that you had lit an orange situation.

“No.”

You turned your head up immediately to look at him. “What?”

Negan shrugged, “No. I’m not letting you go.”

Sputtering, you asked, “W-what? Why?”

Negan looked cold, “I’ve got one of Rick’s people.” He paused and then said, “Well, two, I guess, since you decided suburbia was more your style. And he’s been threatening me as of late.” He leaned forward on the table, staring you down, burning a hole through you. “Seems like you are some high-end collateral.” Leaning back again, he simpered at you, looking triumph, “Just pure business now, baby.”

Your heart was in your stomach. Rick was planning on attacking this place, that much you knew. And now you had no way to escape. And there was no way in hell you were going to tell Negan what was coming.


	7. Chapter 7

You weren’t in a cell like Daryl had been or how Tara was right now. You were sitting outside in one of the gardens, your leg crossed over the other, staring off into space.

Most recognized you out here. There were a few fresh faces, but most of them had been the same and they knew who you were. A royal in this camp, one of Negan’s wives. If they had thought of you as something different when you had disappeared, it was gone now because you were again walking freely, not working your hands to the bone like them.

You tried to ignore their stares, trying to relax and feel the wind across your face.

But you still felt the gazes of all of them. It had been similar before, but you knew most of them were aware you had been missing. And now you weren’t dressed like one of the wives… wearing pants and a shirt. Your thighs, arms, and breasts not on display were a new thing to behold.

“Ya know you probably need sunscreen if you’re trying to tan.”

Your eyes popped open and shot up to Negan, towering over you. He smirked down at you and resentment flushed through your veins. You hadn’t seen Tara since your conversation last night with him. You’d been sent to a room, guards of his stationed outside. You were worried about her and you wanted answers. But, you also were aware he wasn’t going to give you straight ones unless you played games like he did.

So, you settled back, closing your eyes once more, and said, “I don’t want to talk to you, Negan.”

The annoyed sigh leaving his lips was satisfactory. “Y/N, I’ve been pretty fucking nice. I haven’t locked you in a goddamn cell –”

“You put Tara in a cell.”

You didn’t have to crack an eye to know he was giving you a disapproving look. “Couldn’t fucking have you guys conspiring against me and shit now, could I?”

This time you opened your eyes to say, “You should lock me in there too. I belong in there with her. She doesn’t deserve to be by herself. She’s a good person!”

“You’re not going in a cell.” His tone – and gaze – relayed finality. He added after a beat, “I couldn’t do it to ya.”

Scoffing, you told him, “You don’t love me.”

“Stand your ass up right the fuck now.” That caught you off guard and you looked up at him in surprise. He gestured impatiently and repeated, “Stand the fuck up.” You don’t know what compelled you to do so but you did, and you faced him. His gaze was boring into you and you felt like shrinking into yourself, feeling like the same girl you had portrayed to him for months to gain his trust… and possibly his affection.

Negan’s eyes ran over you slowly before snapping up to meet your gaze. “Ya really fucking believe that?”

“Yes.”

Your voice didn’t warble, protecting the unease you felt inside.

His fingers traced up your sides lightly, testing the waters. You didn’t push him away and you averted your eyes.

It would be so easy. It was clear he wanted it. Regardless if it was about attraction or simply having power over you or a combination of both, he wanted it. Badly. Someone to coddle, someone to feel as if he was saving them from some horrible fate… someone to make him feel like he was making a difference in the world.

That was the thing about Negan. He was and could be a complete jackass and dirt bag, but what he wanted most was to improve the world, even if it was in a fucked up way. You wished you knew where that drive came from.

You felt his hands move to flatten against your sides and his fingers rest in, holding you.

“Don’t.”

You tried to pull away, but his fingers dug in and you stopped, looking up at him pleading.

There was a flash in his eyes, “Feeling something?”

“No.”

Cocking his head to the side a bit, he regarded you before asking quietly, “Is it worth it? Is Rick worth it?”

“It’s not about Rick.”

Negan narrowed his eyes slightly. “What are you fighting for then?”

You clenched your jaw and refused to answer him. Suddenly, there was a light in his eye. He leaned in closer and asked with a wolfish smile, “Is she worth it?”

Never could say Negan was stupid. You affirmed, “She is.”

“I drove you to lick pussy?”

“Negan, I liked women – and men – before I met you. Don’t do that.”

“Do what, baby?”

Well, you had been about to argue about him giving himself too much credit. But now… “Don’t call me that.”

Negan’s lips brushed yours and you pulled your head away. His breath on your neck made you shiver and that made him chuckle.

“You’re so fucking stubborn, Y/N. It’s what I love about ya. It’s what I’ve always loved about ya. You’re so delicate but you are like stone when someone tries to move you.” He nuzzled a bit and murmured, “Tell me about Rick. What’s he got fucking stewing up in that big ass, dense head of his?”

You jerked away from him, “I know you didn’t care about me.”

“If I didn’t care, do you really think I would be playing this much foreplay?”

“Yes. You like the game.”

Chuckling, Negan responded, “Not this much, I can assure you.”

“You’re going to be disappointed.”

His expression was unreadable as he looked you over. He wasn’t pleased, you could feel that in the slight tightening of his grip. “You didn’t ever tell me you were leaving me.” You refrained from saying anything, watching him. Shrugging, he told you, “Far as I’m concerned, you were still my wife until I got you back here and you told me to my face.”

“I –”

Negan pressed a single finger to your lips and you stopped talking, more in shock than anything.

His tone was emotionless as he asked, “You fuck her, Y/N?”

“What?”

“Did I stutter?”

“No. I did not have sex with her.”

Negan looked contemplative, “Hmm.” He backed off a few inches and his eyes ran over you. “But ya did kiss her.”

You said nothing which only affirmed his suspicion.

And the small, humorless smile on his face chilled you to the bone. None of this was going to end up working out well.

His hand cupped your face and he caressed your face gently. “We will revisit this conversation at a later time. I got shit to do. I hope next time is more productive.”

With that, his hand fell, and he gave you one last, long look before turning and walking off. His retreating figure was a menacing one, knowing he was a master at concocting plans to get what he wanted.

<> <> <>

It had been less than an hour from your encounter from Negan and you were still uncomfortable with the way it had ended. Trying to shake the uneasiness from your bones, you had gone on a stroll, meaning to go up and down the staircases. It was how you had gotten exercise before and you returned to the motion naturally.

On one of the middle floors however, something stepped into your path before you were going to descend, and you stopped, looking up to find Dwight.

“Come with me,” was how he greeted you.

“For?”

“Now.”

Your jaw set and you followed him stiffly through the Sanctuary. You were heading towards one of the large, open areas in the Sanctuary and dread filled you the closer you got, remembering what was in that room.

Fears were confirmed when you saw Negan towering over Tara who was seated in a chair. Right by the furnace.

“What’s going on?” you demanded.

Negan pointed Lucille at you and you took a step back without thinking about it. If Negan was affected by this, he didn’t show it.

“Having a chat, sweetheart. What does it matter to you?” Before you could speak he let out a chortle, “Oh, wait… I know.”

There was no one else here except the people Negan wanted to see this. He’d kept you separated and not working for a reason. Even if you weren’t wearing the get up, you were still being treated as a wife and everyone outside of this circle would never think of you as anything else.

You caught Tara’s eye and tried to convey your apology about getting her mixed up in all of this. She didn’t look like she had been touched, her hands merely tied behind the chair. Thank god for small favors.

“What? Got nothing to confess?” he cut in, catching your attention again.

“I already told you,” you said exasperated.

Negan smirked at this and placed Lucille’s end far too close for comfort by Tara’s thigh. “I know you did, baby.” He put a hand on his heart, “And you expressed your remorse, Quite goddamn fervently. And me being my forgiving self, I was and am ready to forgive you. I don’t know why you’re fucking freaking out.”

Lying sack of shit. You knew he was trying to get Tara to think you’d cracked.

“Because I didn’t do what you asked. And I don’t like where this is going!”

He mockingly considered that and said, “There’s some truth to that I suppose. You didn’t do exactly what I asked but…” he paused, smirking slightly. “I sure as shit know you’re going to.”

Negan held out Lucille and the guy closest to him took it from him. He moved towards the furnace, keeping his eye on you, a satisfied smirk on his face.

“There are rules, Y/N. You should know better than half these fuckers in here about them. I don’t know what the fuck happened to my darling wife who was so reverent in regard to rules, but she used to exist.” Dwight was reaching the hook into the furnace to pull out that thing that had messed up his face when he’d broken the rules. Your eyes flicked to Tara, who was watching Negan with fear in her eyes. You could only imagine what horrible things were going on in her head watching him take that iron in his hand. “Apparently, I gotta do something drastic to get her back. And I’ll for sure as fucking shit get my answers to my goddamn questions.”

Don’t say anything. Don’t say anything. You kept repeating to yourself in your head. This was a test, he was just trying to flex on the both of you. He wouldn’t burn a woman’s face.

Negan was speaking to Tara now, “Now, I know you don’t know my rules, as I was saying before Y/N came up in here, interrupting our goddamn conversation. But, a real important one that you need to learn fast is: my wives are so fucking off limits. You can’t even believe how big of a fucking no-no that is. And I know for a goddamn fact you knew who she was. Now, it might not be your fault about the circumstance, but I would think someone would still have the goddamn courtesy to make sure the relationship is fucking over before you move in and start trying to get yourself wet.”

Tara’s eyes were trained on him, swallowing sharply. She finally spoke for the first time since you’d entered the room, “Something tells me that’s gotta be rich coming from you.”

You were almost proud of her ability to insult him in her position.

A smile spread across Negan’s face and he said, “Damn. I think I might like you. Too bad I gotta fuck up your face.”

He moved in and Tara started struggling against the ropes bounding her wrists.

He couldn’t. He wouldn’t.

He rose the iron up and Tara’s eyes found yours.

“Negan!” you cried out finally. “Don’t! Please! I’ll tell you!”

Instantaneously, Negan’s hand fell and he let out a whoop of relief. “Damn, Y/N! I thought you were actually going to be that fucking stubborn and let me burn this poor woman’s face! Holy. Shit. Here, take this shit.” He held out the iron to Dwight, who brought it back onto the rod.

Negan threw Tara a smirk, who’s chest was rising and falling rapidly. “I want you to know I’m not gonna be that fucking petty over a fucking kiss.”

To you, he sauntered over and stared you down. You knew he was pissed you’d let it go on that long. You tried to avert your eyes but he reached up, grasping your jaw, and forced you to look at him.

“Told ya you were gonna do what I asked.”


	8. Chapter 8

Negan’s fingers ran gently along your jawline and you jerked your head slightly back, just to give him the message you weren’t comfortable. He looked contemplative, his eyes lingering on your lips.

His bark made you jump slightly, “Now, we’re gonna have this pow wow right the fuck here.” He grabbed onto your arm and pulled you towards the seat he’d been sitting in when you had first entered the room, “Y/N, darling, take a seat.”

You sat timidly across from Tara and she gave you the slightest shake of the head.

The whoosh of Lucille through the air caught your attention before she physically cut between the two of you. The pair of you jumped at the intrusion, your eyes on Negan standing over you.

He was eyeing Tara sternly. “Now there will be abso-fucking-lutely none of that. Y/N is going to be truthful with me. We agreed. Right, sweetheart?” His eyes were on you now and you nodded. He rose his eyebrows expectantly, “C’mon, honey, you know me better than that. I like to hear it.”

“Yes. I agreed.”

Negan gave you a toothy smile, “Good girl. See, things work so much better when you follow rules.” Lucille dropped back to his side and he questioned, “Y/N, Rick have any guns?”

“No. You took them.”

Negan gave a little chuckle, “I know I did. But, he’s had time. Rick isn’t stupid. He won’t leave his people without weapons for long. So, let me ask you again: does Rick have any guns?”

He could ask all he wanted. “I haven’t seen any.”

The stare Negan was giving you was intense and you tried your best to hold his gaze and look innocent. The seconds dragged like they were minutes and you finally averted your eyes, dragging back into yourself as if you couldn’t handle the look anymore. You still felt his eyes burning into you for a few more seconds.

“What about you, darling? You seen any?” He was addressing Tara now.

Her tone was menacing, “I wish.”

That fire is what made you love her.

Negan let out a laugh and told her, “Goddamn, you’ve got some fire in ya.”

He seemed to admire the same thing about her which was not surprising. She would make a good soldier for him. You would have too if you had decided to go that route. But you’d played innocent and crawled into his bed.

And played yourself as someone who bent easily. He was back on you, “What else do you have to tell me?”

Give him something small, to keep him off your backs. “He knows where the Sanctuary is.”

Negan didn’t look impressed. “Course he does. Chip off the old fucking block Carl followed me here in one of the trucks. I’m sure he was able to get some idea of where we are at. So… what?”

You shrugged. “You asked what I knew. I thought that was pretty big. You try to keep it a secret a lot of the time.”

Negan was watching you closely, close enough to gauge if you were fibbing to him or not.

All of a sudden he swooped down in front of you, crouching with Lucille swung across his legs.

“That’s fucking it?”

Your voice didn’t warble when you answered, “Why would he trust me with anything? He knows who I am, and I’ve only been around for three or so weeks.”

“Well, shit. I thought you had something juicer than that for me, Y/N!” He paused before asking, “He gonna attack me?” You didn’t say anything, furrowing your brow. A wolfish grin on his face again as he said, “He is, isn’t he?”

You stammered, “H-how am I supposed to know that?”

“I can see it in your eyes.”

Tara cut in for you, drawing Negan’s attention away, “No matter how much he wants to, you know he’s not stupid enough to.”

Negan smirked, “Until he gets the means to.”

“I can’t read his mind.” She didn’t miss a beat.

“Hmm…” Negan frowned, before standing back up again. His eyes moved between the two of you before he turned away from you two. You watched him closely as his back was to you. He was looking at Dwight and Simon, silent, more than likely exchanging looks.

He whirled back around on his heel and pointed Lucille at Tara. “I don’t fucking believe you.” Tara was stone faced, not flinching under his accusation. You tried to look as emotionless as her, although you were doing cartwheels inside. “You aren’t good at acting, sweetheart. Although, I’m sure you weren’t trying that goddamn hard. Your anger and resentment are getting the better of you.” His lips curled up further into a smile. “You lose someone? Did I do it?”

Your heart clenched, knowing he was getting under her skin. You could see it in her eyes, the hatred spewing from them.

It only took the slightest flick of Tara’s eyes to Dwight for Negan to get it.

Chuckling, he looked back at Dwight, “I guess it was me through an fucking extension then.” Clicking his tongue, he turned his attention back to Tara and met her hateful gaze. “Darling, I’m so goddamn sorry that happened to you. But… you shouldn’t let your fucking anger get in the way of your goal. And you did that just now.” He leaned in closer and whispered, “You can’t bullshit a bullshitter.”

He lingered for a few seconds before whipping around to face you. His group on Lucille was tight in one hand as his other reached out for you. His grip on your arm was tight, closing in like a vise. “Come on, love.” He pulled you up out of the chair and you stumbled, a small gasp escaping your lips. “Conversation time is over for now.”

“Tara?” you tried, over your shoulder.

Negan yanked you along and said, “She’ll be fucking fine, sweetheart. I promise.”

“But – ”

You were out of ear shot now and Negan stopped, facing you, glowering down at you. “No fucking buts, Y/N. Separation protocol still in effect. Especially after that fucking shit.”

“What shit?” you snapped.

Negan closed in, “If you wanna be stupid and chose a losing side, then fine. Be stupid. But, as long as I got you here with me, I’m not letting you walk out those doors when your girlfriend just told me that fucking shit about Rick and the shit brigade! You can do whatever the fuck ya want after all this bullshit is laid to rest. Until then, you’re staying where I know you’re safe. Is that fucking clear?” Your fists were clenched at your sides, trying to keep your anger under control, glaring up at him. His fingers dug into your arm and your angry expression faltered a little. “Is. That. Fucking. Clear. Y/N?”

“Yes.”

His eyes ran over you slowly before he told you, “I wish I could stop you from doing what’s inevitable, Y/N.” You bit down on your cheeks, swallowing a retort. His grip loosened on your arm and he ordered, “Go. Somewhere else. She’ll be fine. You’ve got my word.”

With that, he turned and left you. You swore you saw some worry mixed in with the pissed off look in his eyes.


	9. Chapter 9

“She’s not eating dog food anymore if that makes you feel better.”

You shot him an incredulous look, your mouth falling open slightly. He had been feeding her dog food?

Negan smirked, “What? Do you think I fucking give people a goddamn five star dinner when they’re in one of my cells?”

He’d brought you into his room for a reason. You’d come reluctantly, keeping your distance and sitting stiffly on the couch across from him. It had been a couple of days since he’d ordered that you stay there until he figured out what to do with Rick.

“Has she even come out?”

“That’s not typically how being a prisoner works.”

“Negan, please don’t punish her for my wrongdoing.”

He regarded you before reaching his arm out and grabbing a piece of apple off the plate in front of him. He chewed slowly, watching you closely. You forced yourself to keep eye contact with him, not being intimidated.

Negan swallowed sharply and stated simply, “Let her go.”

His words startled you. “What?”

“Let. Her. Go.”

“W-where?” you stammered.

“Back to Alexandria.”

“If I don’t?”

“I kill her.”

“Are you serious?”

“Hundred fucking percent serious, Y/N. I don’t want to continue worrying about a would-be escapee within my midst. And I don’t see her as being one to fucking rehabilitate and be a part of this crew. So, I either need to cut her the hell loose and go back to Fucksville with the little prick named Rick or wash my hands of her.”

“You don’t want me to go with her.”

“Nope. I already told you why I want you here. Plus… another small contingency is attached to this little sweet ass deal.” He gave you a smile.

You didn’t like where this was going. But you knew where it was leading. “You said you were keeping me here for business purposes only.”

“Tensions were running high. Emotions fucking rampant. I wasn’t thinking clearly. I couldn’t keep you both here like this. Something has got to fucking happen.”

“And you see a golden opportunity and you can’t miss it.”

Negan’s smile was wide, his eyes alight. “Exactly, baby.”

You didn’t even bother to refute him on the nickname and he smirked at the fact.

Leaning back into the couch, he rose his eyebrows at you expectantly, one foot resting on the opposite knee. “So, what’s the answer?”

“How can I trust you’ll take her back?”

“You can ride with us.” That caught you off guard. “Just so you can see her walk through the gates.”

You’d been so close to being free. You’d been so close to being with Tara, having a new home. And it had all gone to shit so quickly. You were foolish to think it would last though. The world was too small now, and Negan was king. And his empire was ever growing. He had it in for you, and that was that. You knew he was a man of his word and he didn’t give a shit about Tara. So killing her would not make any difference to him.

You didn’t want to see what could have been your new family again though. You’d rather not have all their faces fresh in your memory. And you certainly didn’t want to have her have that bad memory at a gate she would have to look at every day if you were separated from her there instead of here at the Sanctuary.

“I don’t need to ride with you if you promise me.”

It was Negan’s turn to look surprised and he chortled, “Wow, always throwing me for a loop, Y/N.” You said nothing to this and he slapped his knee, “You can give her the news.”

<> <> <>

“Why is he doing this?” Tara asked you quietly as the two of you walked out of the Sanctuary towards the trucks in the yard.

Your breath caught in your chest, trying to keep yourself under control. You wondered if Negan would get angry at you for kissing her goodbye. You didn’t want her to get hurt for that. You’d already agreed to be his wife again. You couldn’t kiss her goodbye that made this even harder than it already was.

“Doesn’t want to keep worrying about you escaping.”

Tara snorted and she told you, “Do I look like the one who is going to be escaping and outrunning anyone?”

You tried to change the subject, “He let you shower.”

Smirking, she asked, “Did I smell that bad a couple days ago?”

You forced a smile, “No. I am just… surprised.”

“Said he wanted me to have hugs when we got back rather than the cold shoulder.”

We. He really meant it when you would have to be the one to tell her.

The truck was outside the gate that Simon was waiting by. The gate was coming up quick and you still didn’t know how to tell her. Where was Negan anyway? He had sent some of his men to fetch you and then Tara. Was he even going with her?

The two of you came to a stop in front of the gate and you reached out, grasping her hand. Your hand squeezed tight and you were having a hard time keeping your breathing even. You were starting to hyperventilate.

You could see Tara watching you out of your peripherals as the gate opened, the snarling of the zombies finally getting to you. You were going to be stuck behind this gate, with all of those dead fuckers holding you in while she was taken away. And you were Negan’s again. How had he won again?

“We going or what?” Simon drawled. Your eyes snapped to him. You hadn’t even noticed him close the distance from the truck to in front of you.

Tara started walking forward, her hand still holding yours. Instinctively, you began following her lead, your left foot leading your right.

But a hand clamped down on your shoulder roughly, and the momentum of you stopping halted Tara’s advance.

Foolish. Foolish. Foolish.

Tara looked back at you and her eyes flicked behind you.

Mark’s hand was on you, he had been the one closest to you. “That’s as far as you’re going, Y/N.”

Her eyes were back on you and Mark reached down, his free hand gripping your wrist, yanking down. To her defense, Tara held quick, trying to keep a hold of you. But Mark was stronger, and you winced at the tug. Her fingers slipped from yours.

Tara’s eyes were moving between the two of you wildly, and she half demanded, “Y/N?”

Your head shook, tears brimming your eyes.

Realization dawned on her and she took a step towards you, but Mark had his gun pointed at her immediately. Tara stopped, her eyes boring into you.

You forced out, wavering, “You get to go back to Alexandria. Negan promised.”

She looked devastated. “Y/N… don’t do this.”

“I’m not his wife,” you told her, holding back tears. “He didn’t force that on me.”

“But he’s forcing you to be unhappy,” Tara retorted, tears brimming her eyes now and it was all that much harder for you to hold back.

“Yes,” was all you got out. “It’s my punishment.” A tear escaped, running fat and wet down your cheek. You told her with a shaky breath, “He’s good with those.” Swallowing sharply, you forced out, “He’ll take care of me otherwise.”

“Y/N, you can’t give in to him – ”

“I have to.”

“Why?”

“To keep you safe.”

That seemed to cut her the deepest. “Y/N, whatever the alternative was, take it. I don’t want you to be stuck here – ”

“You’ll come back,” you told her with confidence through tears.

“I don’t think so,” Negan sounded from behind you and your eyes clenched closed, letting out a shaky breath. Of course he was there to sour the moment.

Mark’s hand left your shoulder and you felt another replace it and you knew it was him. You were used to his towering stance, his cologne. His fingers caressed your shoulder gently and you saw the twitch in Tara’s face. If looks could kill, she would have smited Negan on the spot.

“Well, are we fucking leaving or what? I’m sure your suckass leader is fretting about you,” Negan addressed Tara, his hand dropping from your shoulder.

Tara said nothing and Negan simpered before nodding at Simon. He reached out grabbing Tara’s arm to pull her away and she jerked away from him, glaring at him.

“Now, now, don’t cause a scene. Y/N made a great sacrifice. Don’t let it be in vain. She does want you alive,” Negan told Tara, his tone light but his eyes held a different story.

Tara’s eyes met yours again and you barely got out, “I’ll be fine.”

“Course you will, darling,” Negan piped in joyfully. To Tara, he addressed, “So, get the fuck going. I want to get back in time for fucking dinner.”

It felt like forever before Tara was able to tear her eyes away from you and as soon as she wasn’t look at you anymore, you freely let the tears fall, silent.

Negan’s lips brushed your ear as he told you in a joyful whisper, “I got you a fine little number waiting on my bed. Black of course.”

You were stiff, staring straight ahead and when Negan pulled away, he noticed your expression. He smirked before giving a small chuckle and stalked off.

She looked back at you three times and every time you forced a smile, knowing it looked nothing like the assurance you wanted but you did it just the same.


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **FINAL PART

The ride to Alexandria was a tense one. Tara had fury coursing through her veins, staring out the window. Negan was sitting next to her in the back seat of the truck and if she could only get a gun, she would shoot him point blank. But that was no way remotely possible, so she fumed, trying to pretend he wasn’t there.

It was hard when Negan started whistling a jaunty tune.

She couldn’t handle not doing something anymore, so Tara began angrily, “If you hurt her – ”

“Knew this was coming,” Negan cut her off, a wide grin on his face, and Tara glared at him.

She started again, “If you hurt her, I swear: I’ll kill you myself.”

Negan chuckled, “At fucking ease, darling. I don’t hurt my wives.”

His wives?

“In fact, she’s waiting for me when I get back. It’s been a fucking while, so I’m a little anxious and I want this shit to go quick. She’s always been one of my fucking absolute favorites.” Tara’s mouth fell open in shock hearing this and Negan shot her a look. Smiling wide, he apologized, “Sorry. I shouldn’t talk about that shit in front of you yet. Wounds still fucking fresh and all.”

Tara snarled, “You promised her!”

Confused, Negan inquired, “I promised her what?”

“That she didn’t have to be your wife anymore!”

Negan cocked his head to the side, an expression mixed of amusement and confusion on his face. “What are you going on about, darling?”

“Don’t call me that,” Tara snapped at him and Negan rose his eyebrows. “You told her she didn’t have to be your wife anymore. Just that she had to stay there!”

“I didn’t fucking say anything of the sort.” Negan leaned in, his smile condescending, “My little bird lied to you, didn’t she?” Tara’s expression said everything, and Negan chortled leaning away again, “Saving your feelings and whatnot, I suppose.” He sighed loudly and informed her, “You got to go scot fucking free because she came back to me. Other choice of not being back with me was a shit sorry death for you. I promise I would’ve made it fucking quick, dar – ” He paused, smirking, before correcting himself. “Tara. But, I couldn’t afford to keep you in that cell for much longer. Too much fucking man power and so much worthless ass worry on my end.”

Tara’s hands were clenched, her nails digging into her palms, trying to hold tears back. Y/N had lied to her? And stayed behind to save her?

“You’re a monster!” she got out, her bottom lip trembling.

Sighing exaggerated, Negan said, “I fucking get told that hell of a lot by sorry ass people I take stuff from. But, I also know I save a hell of a lot of people, so it can’t be both fucking ways.” Tara said nothing, and he added, “I don’t like betrayal. And Y/N leaving without a word is a giant ass betrayal in my book. I normally burn the fuck out of people’s faces for betraying me, as you almost came so close to knowing. But… not my girls. Never my girls. I just kinda… send them off to go back to menial work.”

“Why couldn’t you just let her come back with me? We weren’t even near your fucking place. Your guys kidnapped us.”

“Cause Y/N is safer with me.”

Tara snarled, “Are you fucking serious?”

“You’re almost dropping the f bomb as much as me. I love it.” He then explained, “I gotta take care of her cause Rick sure as shit can’t.”

“She took care of herself. Think about it. She was by her goddamn self for days! Without any guns! She was able to keep herself safe. And she was able to get herself into Rick’s trust. She doesn’t need anyone to protect her,” Tara retorted scornfully, angry Negan was downplaying Y/N’s strength and self capability.

Negan didn’t say anything for a few moments, staring out the window. He looked contemplative, taking in what she said and mulling on it. When he looked at her again, he was all back to cheeky, “Course Rick let her in. Who could resist that face?” Tara let out a disgusted noise and Negan continued, “Don’t you worry about her. I ain’t gonna let nothing happen to her.”

<> <> <>

Walking back into that room was torture, your gilded cage. Simon was at your back, making sure you did what Negan had asked you to do.

You kept your head up though, even when all the eyes fell on you. The room was a mixture of shocked and sad expressions.

Simon gave you a little nudge to walk further into the room, “Go on, Y/N. I don’t have all damn day.”

Resisting the urge to shoot him an annoyed look, you walked in, moving towards one of the couches. The girls were free to move around normally, but not you. Not yet. You needed to earn trust again. You heard Simon turn and leave the room.

Before you got to the couch, Tanya got up to face you. “You’re back,” she greeted you. Her voice was more disappointment than anything.

You’d squeezed yourself into the bodycon, open backed dress Negan had left on the bed for you, feeling sick to your stomach the whole time. He’d brought that dress back after a particularly nasty trip when he’d lost a few men, yet they’d been able to score a bunch of bottled water, some knives, canned foods, and a nice, new short dress for one of his wives. He’d given it to Sherry first but had asked you to wear it the night he took you to his bed for the first time.

Coming full fucking circle.

Snorting you asked, “Can’t miss the sound of disappointment.”

Tanya shook her head and said, “I’m not upset that you’re here, Y/N. I’m upset that… you’re here. Back. After you’d left.”

Frankie stepped in, “You made it. But… he still won.”

Tara’s face crossed your thoughts and you let out a small, shuddered breath. Tears threatened to fall, and you sniffed, trying to hold the emotions at bay.

“Seems like it,” you got out in a strained voice.

Without needing prompting, Tanya wrapped you up in a hug tightly. Frankie followed suit until you were in a tight ball of sympathy and empathy. The other girls in the room were watching the three of you, a mixture of pity and sadness.

You let some tears fall, unable to hold them in any longer.

“I found someone,” you got out in a harsh whisper. “And he used her to get me back.”

The embrace only tightened, holding you together.

<> <> <>

“Well, here you go. Your girl back. All in one piece.”

Rick looked at Tara, his stare deep. Tara averted her eyes and Negan gave a little laugh.

“If you’re wondering about Y/N, she’s fine,” Negan told Rick, whose eyes flicked back to him. “Tara is fine. Y/N is fine. Everything is just fucking goddamn peachy. Isn’t that right, Tara?”

Tara narrowed her eyes at him before she turned on her heel, storming off away from the group.

One of Negan’s men tried to go after her, as well as Rosita trying to grab her arm, but Tara shrugged her off as Negan held up his hand at his guy.

“Let her go. She needs to cry it out. It’s fucking healthy.”

Rick’s voice was harsh, “What did you do?”

“Careful how you’re fucking talking to me, Rick. What I said is true. They’re both fine.” Negan stepped closer to Rick, peering down his nose at him. “So, what about that trip you were supposed to go on to get supplies for good ol’ fucking me?”

<> <> <>

Tara was curled up on her couch when Rick, Rosita, and Michonne showed up. Rick knocked cautiously, before stepping gingerly inside the house.

She said nothing to them when they came in, avoiding eye contact.

Rick’s voice was soft, “What happened?”

“We got caught.”

“And?” Rosita said.

“Didn’t Negan gloat about it?” Tara snapped and then saw the expression on their faces. She teared up again and wiped her eyes angrily. “Sorry. I-I’m not mad at you.” The three of them said nothing, waiting for her to talk. “She stayed for me.”

“What?” Rick asked for clarification.

“Negan didn’t want to keep me in the cell anymore. Said he was using too much man power – whatever the fuck that means – and didn’t want to worry about me possibly escaping. So, he told Y/N either she stays with him willingly and I go home. Or he kills me, and she still stayed there.” She paused, licking her lips, letting out a shuddered breath. “She lied to me…”

Rosita had moved to the couch and was sitting next to Tara, rubbing her arm affectionately. Tara wasn’t responding but didn’t ask her to leave.

Michonne furrowed her brow, “About?”

Tara’s bottom lip warbled again and answered tearfully, “She said she wasn’t gonna be his wife anymore. Just that she had to stay there but I could go because she was staying.” She wiped at her tears again. “Negan laughed about it. Because she was ‘sparing my feelings’.” Tara punched the couch angrily. “God, I want to fucking gut him!”

Rosita wrapped her up in a hug, and this time Tara put one of her hands on Rosita’s arm, leaning into her embrace.

“I’m sorry, Tara,” Rosita whispered, laying her head against Tara’s. She knew what it was like to lose someone you loved, and Tara knew it was genuine.

<> <> <>

You were sitting on the couch in the common room for the wives. Frankie’s fingers were intertwined with yours, the two of you were on a team against Tanya and Amber in a game of checkers.

“We are losing pretty bad,” Frankie whispered to you, leaning over. Her whisper broke out into giggles and you smiled in response.

As much as you disliked being cooped up here again, you did miss them. You had had some guilt about leaving them all behind, not sharing yours and Sherry’s plan with the rest of them. They had been your best friends in this world and you’d abandoned them.

It made you feel a little better to be among family again.

“We’re awful,” you agreed with her.

“And I’m drunk, unlike you,” Amber crowed.

“Oh, shut it!” Frankie chided her, before laughing again.

The room stilled, and you knew he had walked into the room.

Your eyes moved up and met his. He was zeroed in on you, looking tranquil. You’d been the missing puzzle piece for so long and he was ecstatic to see his masterpiece complete once more.

“Y/N.”

It was an order.

Standing up, you straightened your dress out. It was going to come to this and you needed to be true to the bargain you’d made. Your eyes met his and you moved towards him, leaving the girls behind. It was like this, no matter what you’d all been doing, you’d been summoned and that’s all that mattered.

You followed him out of the room and towards his bedroom. It was the same as you remembered: clean, smelled of spice, and Lucille waiting for Negan.

Sauntering over you to you, he drew his bottom lip in, his eyes dragging over your form. You knew he had been less than amused to see you in plain jeans and a long-sleeved shirt the last time he’d seen you.

“Got you something,” Negan told you, gesturing to the table. “You can take them to the common room and enjoy them. Stopped and picked them myself. Just for you.”

There was a bouquet of wild flowers in a vase on the table. Your eyes flicked between him and the bouquet, annoyance licking at you. As if a bouquet of flowers was going to solve any anger you had towards him.

But you knew better. Misbehaving wasn’t an option right now.

You told him, “Thank you.”

Negan took a couple steps towards you, peering down his nose at you.

“What?” you asked, finally breaking the silence, unable to take it anymore.

“I’ve been thinking… you might not be at all who I think you are.”

“What makes you say that?”

“I heard you survived a few days on your own without shelter.”

You nodded in confirmation.

Negan’s eyes ran over you again, something calculating in his look. His eyes snapped back up to meet your own and he reached out, his hand taking yours.

“You aren’t as delicate as I thought.” His thumb caressed the back of your hand as he paused. “You know I do shit to protect you right?”

“You don’t have to,” you said before you could stop yourself.

Negan’s eyes flashed at this and you thought for a moment you had taken a misstep. But, he told you, “No, I wouldn’t have to if you weren’t my wife. You’re under my wing, and I’ll be damned if you’re putting yourself in danger. Or… trying to go on your own again.”

Negan leaned down and kissed you, his stubble brushing your skin.

“Come here,” Negan growled, tugging you towards the bed. You sat down on the end of it and he worked at the zipper on the back of your dress. You didn’t need any more encouragement and you finished the task for him, shimming out of the dress, sitting bare in front of him. His eyes were blown with lust and he went to work quick to unzip his pants, kicking them off, and freeing himself.

He was heavy on top of you, his lips trailing along your bare skin. His fingers were brushing softly, handling you with care. Until he got to your neck, where he sucked roughly, his kisses bruising along your jawline. When his lips met yours, you gasped in between kisses, him burying you passionately.

Both of your bodies were flushed and warm, his own pressing down against you when he entered you.

Your leg was wrapped around his shoulder as he pounded into you.

His hand closed in on your throat as he continued thrusting and you whimpered. He let out a guttural noise at your sound, his hooded eyes meeting your own.

His nose nuzzled against your ear and he practically purred, “Oh, my little bird… you can’t play innocent anymore.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **FINAL PART


End file.
